Photos By: Michelle Girard
Happy Labor Day! Since I’ve been featuring my husband Robert’s name on the blog more often, I thought I’d get more personal, and write about some things we do in our relationship to stay connected. I put these into some simple, practical tips on how to keep your relationship fun – whether you’re just dating, newly married, or have been a couple for years! Read below, and don’t forget to add your own tips in the comments.
Surprise each other.
Routine can get old – whether that’s what you cook, how you dress, or even the way you relax together at the end of the day. Predictability can lead to complacency sometimes. So spice things up by planning a random day out, leave him a cute post-it message on the fridge, do stuff differently to the day, week or month before.
Educate each other
I can’t tell you how important intellectual stimulation is to a relationship. If you’re reading a book – tell him about it. Discuss the news, debate the latest movie, go to a local gallery. Feed yourselves with culture whether it’s gossipy pop culture or far more refined. A constant curiosity to learn more from each other and your opinions, makes a partnership grow and deepen.
Take him on his dream date
Not yours. If that means a football game or paint-balling followed by a dive bar (which actually sounds quite fun!) then do it. You’ll have more fun than you expect, and he’ll appreciate the major effort on your part.
Not in that look-at-us-in-matching-Lycra kind of way, but getting those endorphins flowing together is very bonding. Robert and I always use each other as a support to get our butts back in the gym, or for a hike on a weekend morning. It helps having a buddy to gym it with, and if it your best person in the world, then it’s even better!
Take an interest in his job
Robert job can be complicated, including things that often times go right over head. But I know at the end of the day when you’re fired up or excited about something that happened at work and want to tell someone your story, it’s important to be that someone for him, even if you don’t fully follow everything he is saying. It’s important to take an interest in what he’s up to, what his goals are, and how the office politics go. Sometimes an outside opinion can actually help, and the mere fact that you’re asking questions, shows you care.
And then don’t…
Judge the situation. Sometimes work is the last thing you need to be discussing, and as a wife or girlfriend, the best thing you can do is open a bottle of red and crack some jokes. Being able to take each other’s mind off of your busy day, is key.
Right now Robert and I love our alone time, we spend every single day together and are perfectly fine with that. But their will be times where we need a little time with friends. I have heard from many people who have been married longer than Robert and I have, that having close friends around on a trip is actually a really fun way to keep the laughter going, and in a weird way brings you closer together as a couple, when you retire to your room at night. Plus, I love watching Robert get animated as he tells a story across the table. He’s the life and soul of the party, and it makes me even more attracted to him.
Watch a hilarious movie, go to a stand-up show. There is nothing like simultaneous LOL-ing to make you feel in love.
Tell him he’s hot
And this works both ways. Couples often forget to complement each other entirely. Confidence is crucial for everything from affection to careers. So tell him how damn handsome he looks today.
Remember how silly and care free you were the night you met? How, for those first few weeks or months, you laughed your head off and really didn’t care about anything except seeing him? Then real-life creeps in. Bills, paperwork, deadlines, responsibility. Well I get it. Robert and I often find ourselves stressing out over things that are probably not as huge as we make them out to be. But when the big kid in us comes back out to play, Robert and I get along the best. It’s not always easy, but acting silly and goofing off when you can, is, – I think – the fastest way to a happy partnership.
Happy Labor Day Friends!